Naenae – Part 1
My childhood was really difficult because I didn’t know exactly who I was as a person. It was the early 90’s, I decided I liked a girl, I got beaten up for that.
My Dad’s white and of that generation. My Mum is Maori, we never talked about Maori heritage. When I found out about our heritage, I decided, well, I’ll go and study it. I’m Te Āti Haunui-a-Pāpārangi.
It’s only been in the last probably five years that I’ve been okay with who I am and not so much about who I should be.
It started with my daughter, she wanted to go to a drag show. She was really shy, very sensitive and she would be the first to be bullied and the first to cry over anything, but she seemed to align herself with my friends who were LGBTQ+ who were drag queens.
We went to a show, and she said she wanted to do drag and I was like, maybe that will help get her confidence up. They said she can do drag as a 12 year old but I’d have to do it with her. I say yes to everything. We did our first drag show, that’s when it started to change, I just kept doing drag. I’d like to say that the drag community brought my child up to be who he really is, and he opened doors for me that I would have ever opened myself.
Because I’m biologically a woman and I do drag queen stuff, It confuses a lot of people. I kind of walk through life on the outer of everything, but I feel a part of the LGBTQ+ community because it has not just shaped my son, but it shaped me.
My drag’s not entirely appreciated by some people. I still squeeze myself in those spaces because it’s about me, there is a little bit of selfishness in just living. When you do art for you, you put more heart in it, and you find other people who are like, ‘I need that! I might be able to do that!’ In that selfish way of working, you’re actually helping other people around you.
I’m not that comedic or sexy queen. I’m macabre and avant garde so I don’t fit those boxes. I want to see more art, I want to see people rip their heart out on stage and go, bam! This is me.
I need the audience to see that it’s okay to be them.